Friday, June 24, 2011

Big Thunder Mountain is making everyone crazy! It must be stopped!

A postman has claimed that the reason he went on a stealing spree was because riding the Disneyland Paris version of Big Thunder Mountain traumitized him, making him crazy.

Now that we know the mild thrills of Big Thunder are enough to drive someone to make such terrible decisions, we can look back and see it's to blame for other aful ideas too, such as...

Dwayne Johnson's photo Rock wins.. again.

Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson only made The Tooth Fairy because Big Thunder Mt. made him crazy.


Big Thunder didn't just drive Jersey Shore's Pauly D crazy enough to make him think this hairdo looks good, riding it is also how he gets it light this in the first place.



Hey, it's the Hilton sisters, Paris and Not Paris! What activity can they blame on Riding Big Thunder Mt? Open up a tabloid and take your pick!


Miley Cyrus riding Big Thunder was such a traumatic experience that it actually drove disney crazy and made them think she could act! That's one dangerous roller coaster!


Before country rock duo The Carter Twins rode Big Thunder THERE WAS ONLY ONE OF THEM! MADNESS!


BIEBER! Need I say more?


But wait, what's this? 30 Rock creator and best-selling author Tina Fey and her talented musical husband riding Big Thunder? How did they survive the coaster and not go on to become crazy people? Look again - they're NOT on Big Thunder, that's Expedition Everest. Easy mistake.

Your honor, Big Thudner Mountain is obviously too dangerous to our culture to be allowed to go on. It must be stopped!

I rest my case.

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